Hello? Words feel tentative and strange after all the silence here of late… I was walking to the library yesterday, and passed these cherry trees at the primary school in full bloom. And immediately, I remembered taking photos of the cherry trees along the river in Portland five years ago, how that was the moment when the idea of this space first felt real and possible. Yesterday’s unexpected cherry blossoms felt like the nudge from the universe to come back here.
I decided back in January that it was time to let go of this space, that it didn’t quite fit me anymore and I was ready to close it up. And it felt important to me that I do that, somehow state my intention and not just trail off in the middle of a thought. But somehow, I never quite found the words or made it back here to do that.
And then, a couple weeks ago, something shifted. It occurred to me that while this space didn’t quite fit me anymore, I was free to change that. The container of the blog was a little stale, but it was really how I was showing up to it that wasn’t working for me. When I started writing here five (!!) years ago, I didn’t know what that would look like but over time, I found a groove. Since then, my life and my interests and the things that really engaged me have continued to evolve, but how I shared here didn’t so much.
I want to change that. I want to try to write about the things that feel alive for me right now, even when they feel too vague or weird. I want to reject the narrative that no one else could possible be interested in photos of the sky, because they sure seem to captivate me. Or whatever I’m fascinated by next. I really don’t know how this will go or what it might look like, but I guess that’s the sort of thing that you mostly just have to figure out by doing.
Thanks for coming along on the ride.
The ride! The most recent musical hole I’ve (happily) fallen down has been Amanda Palmer’s new album, and I highly recommend it, starting with the epic song The Ride.